optimism anyone?

2008-11-20T06:38:00.000-08:00

I had an entire blog entry written the other day about the strange behavior of ex's. Basically it was a long detailed rant about how a disgruntled ex of mine ignored my attempts at resolution and closure, however, she constantly puts posts on MY friend's facebook pages, where she knows I'll see them. It just seemed wierd to me, however, I don't really want this to be a vehicle to air grievances, or a voice of negativity especially against people that are in the past, and should stay there. This brings me to my next point.
There are certain people that I've had the good fortune to have touch my life, who I admire greatly. These people tend to have something in common. Their outlooks on life are all overwhelmingly positive. Regardless of what comes their way, they meet challenges head on, they don't indulge in self-pity, they overcome their obstacles, and nothing ever seems to defeat them. These people are people who I aspire to be more like. I wonder how nothing seems to bother them. Maybe it does, maybe they just hold it in to an unhealthy extent. I don't think so, though. These people seem to just have genuine goodness in them. One of the most amazing things about these people (at least two of them) is that they, at a young age, lost either one or both of their parents. It blows my mind that someone who has experienced such a loss at such an early age can move on and still see life as inherently good. I wonder sometimes, if this tragic experience made them value life more, and possibly see the good in living everyday as if it were their last. An old friend of mine, Felisa, lost her mother when she was in the 7th grade. I can't imagine the loss she must have felt, however she has gone on living her life. She has done so with a positivity that has always inspired me. She is now the kind of mother to her two daughters that she must have longed for for so many years.
There are others who I feel are just naturally born patient, and forgiving. People who never had a great tragedy (or at least not one that I knew of) to make them see the value in life. They just "get it" somehow. People like my sister's husband, who even though she's an evil disgruntled grouch in the morning, loves her anyway, and is patient with her. People like my friend Brent who probably knows me better than anyone and still shrugs and says, I accept you for who you are, and you're a close friend anyway.
So, while it's still a month and a half until the new year, I am making a resolution early. I'm not gioing to let the little things get to me. I won't waste time on feeling sorry for myself. I'll surround myself with positive people, and will help spread my newfound outlook to those who see the world more darkly than I do. Also, I pledge to be patient with people, to accept them for who they are, not who I want them to be. As Ghandi famously said, you have to be the change you wish to see in the world. This may sound naive, and foolishly optimistic. But I'm going to try.
Wish me luck

Welcome all!

2008-11-14T09:01:00.000-08:00

Welcome all readers to my initial entry into the world of blogging. Firstly, let me state that I truly hate the word "blog", I know, it's an abbreviation of the words "Web log" however I am one of those people who hates abbreviations, can't stand "trendy lingo", and nearly wants to vomit when I hear things like, "staycation", or "OMG". However, since "blog" has now so ingrained itself into our everyday vernacular, I will refer to my "web log" as such.
The other day on my facebook page I commented that I was wondering on which side of the narcissistic/introspective line I stood. I think I'm probably leaning towards the former. Fortunately I feel that blogs are the perfect outlet for an admitted (or closet) narcissisist. They're self indulgent. They allow the writer to pontificate about any topic they please, however, most people usually talk about themselves, their feelings, what's on their mind, etc. As I've already admitted, I myself have a bit of a self indulgent streak, so most blog postings will be regarding what's rambling about in the head of Joshua Brent McFall (narcissists regularly speak in third person). So...Here goes.
As a young person (I hope I can still call myself that) I'm still trying to figure out the things that matter most to me. I'm an honorably discharged veteran of the U.S. Air Force, with a good job, a nice apartment in downtown Denver, which I share with a beautiful girl, and a dog who loves me, (I hope the girlfriend does too). I have all the material posessions I need (aside from a kitchen table, whole nother story), the nice car, the awesome skis and snowboard, and seasons pass to 5 different colorado ski areas, and more than enough running/hiking/biking/skiing/snowboarding trails to efficiently occupy my time. I'm also going back to school this January. So...What else could a boy want, right?
Well, here's where the whole priorities topic comes into play. From birth we're all subliminally told that there is a path that we are supposed to stay on. This path weaves from elementary school, to junior high/high school, playing sports, chasing girls, college education, into a career, to marriage, family, mortgage payments, little league games, boring meetings, 401k's, investments, college payments for the kid who was playing little league yesterday, Bailing the kid out when he does the stupidest things, realizing you used to do the same things, Do we have enough to retire?, The gold watch retirement sendoff, Grandkids, the big RV, watching your body deteriorate, certain things don't work like they used to, and your wife's an old lady anyway, Dr. visits, pills...lots of pills, watching your friends die, and eventually, death.
OK, so that's kind of a bleak interpretation of life, but it seems to me that so many people, through a series of choices, trap themselves into that bleak predetermined fate, and I just don't want it to be me. I've been called self-destructive by some. I think sometimes I was just rebelling against the norm. I don't know if that rebellion is something I'll someday outgrow, but keep watching. I'm sure it'll be entertaining from now until then.

The Semi-Coherent Ramblings of a Nomadic Wanderer

optimism anyone?

Welcome all!